just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
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