He is such a slut. More and more my type.
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
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