he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Randomize