Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
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