Whoa Z and x make the same sound
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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