Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
