The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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