Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
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