this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
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