we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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