eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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