Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
