Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Randomize
