think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
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