we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
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