this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
how drunk are you?
Several
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
