This girl is more easily done than said...
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Randomize
