My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
Randomize
