Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
Randomize