it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize
