I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
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