how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
I think my vagina is haunted
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
Randomize
