I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
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