i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
