Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
love makes seman taste better
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
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