He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Randomize
