Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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