Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Still dying that you shit outside
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
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