I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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