I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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