I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
