even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
i think i just lost a toe
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
