We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
