The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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