i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Randomize
