i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
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