doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
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