I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Randomize
