I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
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