I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
