Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Randomize
