It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
