I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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