she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
she pinky promised me she was 18
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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