it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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