he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
