Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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