He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
