i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
