I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
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